HONDA FIT SI:
The Honda Fit is one of the best small hatches available in the U.S., and the Civic Si is one of our favorite on-the-cheap sport coupes. Boost the Fit's power by about 50 ponies, stiffen the chassis, and add Honda's lovely six-speed manual gearbox and we'll go out and buy one. Or seven.
BMW M3 TOURING:
Mercedes-Benz has already tempted us with its C63 and E63 wagons which aren't coming to our shores, so we're secretly hoping that BMW will give the M3 treatment to its 3-Series wagon body. After all, General Motors has confirmed that a CTS-V wagon is in the works, and we'll need another contender for the most badass comparison test ever.
Besides, BMW owes us one. After all, it made an M5 Estate and decided it wasn't fit for American drivers. (And yet we get the X5 M? Get your priorities in check, BMW.)
MERCEDES-BENZ GLK63 AMG:
As it stands, the GLK and GL are the only Benzes which don't benefit from some sort of AMG treatment. (The R63 AMG doesn't exist anymore, but it's still in our hearts forever.) The GL would be a bit much, but if Mercedes-Benz is comfortable with shoving the 6.2-liter V-8 into the ML crossover, we don't see a reason why the smaller GLK's performance volume shouldn't be turned up to eleven.
FORD FUSION SVT:
Remember the Contour SVT? We sure do. After a decade of fine-tuning, Ford has quite the impressive Fusion on its hands right now -- a perfect starting point for some Audi S4 battling. Shove the 3.5-liter EcoBoost six under the Fusion's hood, keep the all-wheel drive, and let us take it to the track.
SUZUKI SX4 TURBO:
Suzuki has teased us with turbocharged SX4s before, and we know that there are plenty of tuner kits available in the aftermarket, but we'd like one right off the factory line that we can buy at our local dealership. We want to go all WRC-happy with it and race it down the side of a mountain.
SUBARU LEGACY STI:
While the Japanese market has seen STI-badged Legacies for years now, we American's want our turn at some turbocharged sedan hotness. The 2.5 GT is already a pretty good entry in the Legacy line, but we want bulgy fender flares, a higher-output turbo, gold wheels, and an obnoxiously big wing out back. Plus, the new Legacy bodystyle would be perfect for some riced-out hotness.
NISSAN VERSA NISMO:
The Honda Fit Si is going to need something to compete with, right? Here's the easy answer, Nissan -- take your Sentra SE-R motor, shove it in the Versa, make it stiffer, give it a more aggressive, Nismo-happy body, and boom -- we're happy.
Want to get the kids to soccer practice at an electronically limited speed of 155 miles per hour? Like the Mazdaspeed3? Then the Mazdaspeed5 would be a perfect addition to Mazda's North American lineup.
Besides, look at this photo. If this were the Speed5, Karen would have time to speed away with her surfboard before her deadbeat boyfriend (who has been checking out other surfer girls all day) can make it back to the car.
We know, we know -- fat chance. But hey, we can dream of the new supercharged V-6 being shoehorned into the A3 body, right? And even if Audi does roll out an RS3, ten bucks says that it won't come to the States.
For now, we'll just have to enjoy the limited-production MTM A3. Mmm.
MITSUBISHI LANCER SPORTBACK EVOLUTION:
Where's your God now, Subaru STI?
When the new Evo and STI launched in 2008, it was no longer a battle of the sedans, since the Subie is only available as a hatchback. But now Mitsubishi has a really sexy Sportback bodystyle in the Lancer lineup, and we'd love to see the Evo treatment done to it.